The Spot

There is a spot near the entrance of the building I live in. The spot where a woman reached, from the wall of a corridor of the building, where it was a little lower and one could climb up to. It took only seconds, I suppose. To reach that spot from some ten floors above, traveling by gravity. The spot was surrounded with "POLICE" tapes and forbidden for a day. And the security guards burned scents and other stuffs for the dead for a few days too.


The spot is near the entrance and part of the shortest path from the building to the bus stops behind it. It was not like that you must get through that spot to go behind the building. But you can imagine that you can't jump from a building and land 10 meters away from it, you land near it. In fact I think it feels like landing below the building, as near the spot there are covered areas extended from the building. So I often stepped on, and I still do, that very spot where her body crashed and cracked, and where blood was shed all over.


The strange thing is, I couldn't feel that terrible incident at all going to skool getting through that spot, at all, even with the knowledge of all these. Even with witnessing the "POLICE" tapes and the security guards burning stuffs with my eyes, even with also some bits of the woman's story, and my parents talking about the incident.


How could I not, why could I not?
That spot was where someone's life ended, where a living body was turned into some inanimate, heavy flesh and leaking, darkening blood. Even with as violent a death like this, there was no trace of death, or life, to be remained and remembered. How come? Do things that happened only exist in the past?


Erm, what am I writing? I didn't start the post to talk about such things. Let's start again.
I left home at 3AM or something like that tonight, when mother n father went to bed. To smoke and, I dunno, have a moonlit walk perhaps? To think, I guess. Cos I thought a lot. About lots of stuffs. And I looked at that spot, and wondered about many things.
If things happened to a spot, a place, a thing, can mean nothing to the present like that, then, what about to a person? Hmmmmmm too long already for a to-get-myself-sleepy post.